Freaky Friday: USDA Requires Magician to Create Disaster Plan for Rabbit!

Just when you thought you heard it all along comes the federal government to throw a curveball at you. In a story that is part comical, part frustrating, but 100 percent true; the US Department of Agriculture compelled a magician to come up with a disaster plan in case something occurs (i.e. hurricane). The plan the feds want is not for the magician though, they want it for his rabbit. Yes, HIS RABBIT:

“My USDA rabbit license requirement has taken another ridiculous twist. I just received an 8 page letter from the USDA, telling me that by July 29 I need to have in place a written disaster plan, detailing all the steps I would take to help get my rabbit through a disaster, such as a tornado, fire, flood, etc. They not only want to know how I will protect my rabbit during a disaster, but also what I will do after the disaster, to make sure my rabbit gets cared for properly.  I am not kidding–before the end of July I need to have this written rabbit disaster plan in place, or I am breaking the law.”

Ozark, Missouri magician Marty Hahne is no stranger to dealing with the USDA, considering that surprise inspections have occurred and movements on travel have been reported to the department during occasions when he would take his show on the road. This was all part of maintaining licensure to have the animal as part of the act and he seems to have been dealing with the inconvenience of the regulatory process in stride. Now, Mr. Hahne is letting everyone know just how difficult it is to make a living when the government starts going overboard with the regulatory process.  According to Hahne, “A lot of hoops to jump through to just have one rabbit, I don’t need the government to waste my time.”  No word on whether or not he has trained his rabbit to jump through those hoops.

This is a waste of time and not to mention money being spent on the type of work that has to be done to implement and follow up on ridiculous requests like this based on some obscure regulation enacted years ago. The request by the USDA originated out of the 2005 Hurricane Katrina disaster, where thousands of domesticated animals were left unattended in the aftermath. The new rule was completed in January, with the planned rollout to take effect this summer mandating that any US business that “sells, exhibits, or performs research on animals” must develop a disaster plan for emergencies that may occur. This rule applies to anything from a pet shop, to a zoo, to a sole practitioner magician who has a rabbit in his act.

There may be some positive news coming from this story, as a little common sense may be substituted for the ridiculous. The USDA announced earlier this week that they will take a closer look at the rule, it is unclear what prompted the announcement as it came shortly after the Washington Post reported on the story but officials at USDA say they had been planning a reexamination of the rule prior and that is entirely possible considering this story was first reported in late June. A spokeswoman for the USDA said that, “Secretary Tom Vilsack asked that this be reviewed immediately and common sense be applied.”

Whatever resolution ultimately comes from this story, the larger point is that we are  seeing more of the same hampered down hoop-jumping nonsensical regulatory ineptitude from the federal government looking for any excuse to intrude on the lives of individuals just trying to make an honest living. There really is no excuse for Mr. Hahne to be harassed to the point where it becomes a national story, yet here we are talking about the situation after nearly a month. This should have been dealt with day one and the letter he received should never have even been sent in the first place. While TPA is encouraged by the recent statement out of USDA that they will take a closer look at how to implement a more commonsense approach when it comes to the new rule, we aren’t optimistic that they don’t have something even more ridiculous up their sleeve.